Those parents who time and again fight, then it happen that those parents also have different views for the upbringing of the child. Hence, the child that does not get parents’ love but gets two different individuals’ love having different views. Actually, there is lot of strength in the combined love of parents. Actually, a true test of husband and wife begins after the birth of a child. It is not easy to become parents of a successful child. Parent’s social, financial and professional responsibilities increase after the birth of the child. After the birth of the child, the parents should be generous in understanding each other. And if they cannot be generous, then small arguments and fights will increase and this will have strong effect on the behavior, sleep, hunger, speech, and mental growth of the small child.
The little child is unable to understand that if two people are imparting me love individually, then why these two people are not able to love each other? The thought process of the developing brain of the child gets distracted. Many a times the external issues are the reasons for the continuous fight and arguments of the parents Rather than difference in opinions. Because of the upbringing and responsibility of the child, parents find less time for each other. Because of this reason they are unable to freely have any discussion regarding family and social issues. As time passes many issues remain unresolved and expectations of both parents increases, which gradually takes place of fights and arguments. The parents fight more for the children and try to prove their point correct. They don’t think of resolving the matter with mutual consent and understanding. Instead both of them always try to win the situation. As a result, the child also develops cranky nature and also does not mix with the other kids. In order to make child a cultured and well behaved human being, 25% of child’s hard work is needed, 25% of parents’ time energy and money are required, 25% of opportunity and luck are needed and last but not the least and 25% of parents’ combined efforts are needed. (The children whose parents forgive each other’s mistakes or take it lightly are very lucky and they get the benefit of last 25%).
Many a times, two kids having same IQ, studying in the same class from the same teachers score different result in the examination. This is only because of the atmosphere of the house. The parents who have jovial nature and crack jokes and are always smiling, their kids always stay happy and are socially active, smiling and of loving nature. On the other hand, the children of the parents who keep on fighting on petty issues, have suspicious nature and also lack in human relationship.
In front of the child the mother and the father should not accuse each other or pin point each other’s mistake. When they both are alone they can solve their problems peacefully. In the presence of the child they should respect each other’s qualities and good deeds. According to me the discussions regarding child’s studies, clothes, games and sports, school, his or her hobbies, books etc. should not be collectively taken by parents. Out of all the matters, mother should have right to take decision on 60% matters. And father should consult with mother regarding the other 40% matter and then decide over it. It should not happen that mother does all the work of the child and the father does not do anything giving the excuse that he does not have time. And after that if anything goes wrong with the child, the father blames mother for that. This is not acceptable at all.
When there are two kids in the family, parents should change the priorities. Plan everything properly, even try to make adjustments. The journey of life will seem long and tiresome even if they work hard but do not support each other. But if they have love and mutual consent, then they will have brilliant and successful children. It will be a compound interest for them. When kids are growing, parents have to become best friends and show their love and compassion. The most hardworking generous and adjusting parents only can create the best kids.
[Divya bhaskar Aug 2015]